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The Candy Man Can't

Gordon Ramsay, Hayden Panettiere and comedian Ryan Stout

Apr. 12, 2011

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Just Another Typical Gay Jewish Televised Wedding in New York
The Mystery of the Recent NYU Grad Who Got a Job
A Tree with Dutch Elm Disease Grows in Brooklyn
It's the Great Pumpki-- No Wait, That's Just Conan's Head
The Unbearable Lightness of Light Beer
Enter the Enterer
The Zombie Who Preferred Salads
Footloose 3: Footloosest
The Pretty Girl Waving to Someone Behind You
Karate Kid 9: Return to Nun-Chuck Island
Alibi for the Murder Andy's Committing Tonight
The Day the Mirth Stood Still
The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo on Her Face Who Was Unemployable
Death Takes a Staycation
The Way to a Man's Heart Is Through My Multi-level Marketing Plan
God Never Closes a Door Without Laughing at You
It Turns Out Stella's Groove Was On Her Head the Whole Time
The Day the Proofradar Quit
The Fluffer of Seville
The Hunchback of Dekalb County Community College
The Murdering Murderer of Murdertown
President Björk Saves the Day
Quoth the Raven, "That Is So Me!"
The One Hour of Footage George Lucas Hasn't Messed With
And the Wind Cried, "Harriet."
A Streetcar Named Dr. Nathan Gluckman
The Title the Announcer Didn't Read Right
Alex Trebek in Actual Jeopardy
Eat, Love, Lather, RInse, Repeat
I Know What You Did Last Lobsterfest
Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Rabbi
Dragon Tamer 3: Dungeon War 2: The Prequel
The Devil Drives Stick
The Dr. and Mrs. Howard P. Reynolds Foundation Murders
The Decline of Dee Klein
I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream When Our Elevator Plunges 40 Floors
What if the Title's Too Long for Andy to Successfully Fit it in to the Opening Announce?
And the Wind Whispered "Balls"
Cowboys & Aliens 2: Showdown at Glorb Ranch
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings Karaoke
The Gentile's Bar Mitzvah
Cut, Cap, Balance, And Boogie
The Silvery Thistles of St. Lispmoor
The LOL from Hell O Hell
The One Where Conan Does That Thing
The Devil Went Down to 7-Eleven and Bought A Slurpee
Hug Me, Sighed the Porcupine
One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish - Oh, God, My Whole Life Has Been a Horrible Lie
Hell Hath No Cell Phone Reception
Length x Width = Tears
Death Gets a Paper Cut
50,000,000 Connie Selleca Fans Can't Be Wrong
An Atheist Named Faith
Dragonpuncher 3: The Punchening
Are You There, God? It's Me - Your Loanshark
What Happens On Krypton, Stays on Krypton
Me. Coli
A Recipe for Disaster Casserole
Quoth the Hipster, "Whatevermore."
The Title Will Be Added In Later
It's Gettin' Hard Out There for a Pope
She Sells Sea Shells Made Out of Rubber Baby Buggy Bumpers
Savage. Fred Savage.
Wow! You DO Care About These Episode Titles.
Is Anyone Paying Attention to These Friggin' Episode Titles?
Green Eggs & Health Code Violations
Quoth the Raven, "No Comment"
Do Not Go Gentle Into That Pink Berry
Willy Wonka and His Much Less Popular Beef Jerky Factory
Mr. Smith Goes to Hades
Murder at the Murder Trial
Tomorrow's Episode
Fuzzy Wuzzy, or Fuzzy Wuzzn't He?
The Indiscriminate Highlighter
The Falcon CAN Hear the Falconer, Thanks to Miracle Ear!
Untitled Freddie Prinze Jr. Project
The Awkward Product Placement. Swiffer
Typo Mysteries Presents: The Haunted Hose
The Umlaut Initiätive
The Twin Horrors of Professor Blurryvision
The Container Store of My Discontent
Redbeard's Last Stand
The Brobdingnagian Abyssinian
The Boy Who Actually Used Algebra Later in Life
Dial T for Misdialed Murder
On This Day, A Chump Was Born
Dr. No, M.D.
The Devil's Pre-nup
The Candy Man Can't
A Man For 3 Out Of 4 Seasons
Ding Dong the Witch is Dad
As Time Goes Bi-Curious
Grandpa's Secret, Grandma's Shame
Countdown to Crotchfire
Where There's a Will, There's a Dead Person
Terra Chips at 30,000 Feet
Hell's Cul-De-Sac
The Lion, The Witch, And The Ikea Aspelund Underbed Storage Box
And in This Corner... Gingivitis!
The Spatula Peninsula
Ninjas Don't Wear Corduroy
Excuse Me, But May I Murder You?
Everybody Wang But Don't Chung Tonight
Seven Salads for Seven Brothers Who Are Sexually Attracted to Salads
Captain Facepunch vs. the Punch-Proof Face!
The Rise and Fall of John Reisenphal
A Mystery Wrapped Inside a Calzone
World War Wheeee!
The Double-Fudging Of Vanessa Del Rio
The Case of the Missing Show Title
Hooray For Scabies
If This Van's a Rockin', I'm Having a Seizure Inside My Van
Air Force One 2: Revenge of President Dracula
The Devil's Email Attachment
The Asiago Index
How Stella Got Her Car Back
Love Gets Liposuctioned
Death Takes A Time-Share
Octoparrot vs. Megakitten
The Unitard Dilemma
"Whisper," She Shouted
Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Humor Truck
Rendezvous at Meet-Up Point
A Finger Un-Pulled
Who Will Cry for The Third Nipple?
A Renaissance Most Foul
You Say Tomato, I Also Say Tomato
Something Smelly That Way Went
Hello And Dubai
Damn The Torpedoes, Full Greed Ahead
The Conundrum Enigma
A Fistful of Dollars, A Mouthful of Travelers Cheques
Houston, We Have A Murder
The Monkey's Paw And Then The Rest Of The Monkey
Voodoo or Voo Don't
Return to Devil's Condo
2011: A Spanx Odyssey
Santa vs. Rudolph vs. Predator
The Mistletoe Manifesto
A Quantum of Kwanzaa
Fa-La-La-La-La, La-La-La-Murder
Hairdryer: 1, Frosty: 0
How the Grinch Stole Innocence
A Sleigh Full of Slay
The El Chapo Cartel Saves Christmas
Zeus was Framed
Do You Want Lies with That?
No Time for Tetherball
One if by Land, Two if by a Slightly Longer Land-Route
A Jeff Bridges Too Far
Paper or Plastique?
Satan's Kazoo
What the Rowboat Saw
The Turducken Kerfuffle
One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Dead Fish
Wanted: Dead... or with Chives
A Prayer for Dick Butkus
Heavy Hangs the Fannypack
The Equinox Equinox
A Fistful of Chowder
Hickory Dickory Danger
The Mummenschantz Conundrum
Dead Men Don't Wear Spanx
Murder, She Tweeted
Baa Baa Blackmail

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